What happened today made me realize things about myself that I have been denying for quite a while.

I was too eager to please my boss, or perhaps too casual with her that I forgot about other things and the implications of my words and actions on others.

Upon deeper reflection of why I was too eager to please, I came to realize some things about myself.

1) This is naturally what I do. I seek to bring my best work forward to the things I love to do, and that I continuously aim to perfect my work so that my work shows my capabilities. I should probably learn that I can never be perfect, and it's ok to fail sometimes.

2) I may have some problems accepting the fact that people may find faults with my work or things that I have missed out, especially after I presented it to my boss. This shows that I have not done a decent job in the first place and my work is not up to my standards. Well, really. I have to learn to accept my mistakes, ackowledge them and learn from them, so that I won't make them in the future. Also, I truly learned that it's always good to have an extra pair of eyes to review my work. They might spot things that I missed out, or because of my biases, tuned out.

3) The reason why I am eager to please was because I really want to secure a perm job at my workplace. There. I said it. I want a job desperately. But this isn't the main reason why I do things. Even after getting the job, I will still put in my best in whatever I do. But yeah. For now, this remains one of the contributing reasons.

Really. There's a lot of learning points today. :)